Thar He Blows

“How was the fundraiser last night? A lot of people?” “The usual suspects. You know, the elementary school schmooze at warp speed.” “Get anything good at the silent auction? Last year, I bought a bunch of gift certificates.” “I got two tickets to a concert. My buddy Jeff yelled at me for underbidding and told …

The Butcher. The Baker. The Custom Cabinetmaker.

“Do you want to go over and see Elise and Rob’s new outdoor kitchen?” “What’s an outdoor kitchen?” “They built a full kitchen next to their patio. Top-of-the-line everything. So they can cook outside all summer long. And it has a built-in spit. They can roast a whole pig!” “Why would they want to do …

Help! Wanted for the Want Ads

Back in the days when print media ruled the suburban sprawl of America, The New York Times reigned supreme. From the crack of dawn, from one driveway to the next, you could find the newspaper waiting patiently for tasseled or slippered feet to arrive. Scooping the paper into their hands, subscribers would devour it from …

Knee Deep in Suburbia

  I am a dad, husband, son, mortgage holder, weed wacker, dishwasher loader, grill master, friend to my neighbors and no friend to any vermin or insect attacking my foundation. Occasionally, I get to watch the game but more often I am coaching where dribbling and passing are an art form. Instead of beers and …